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Coder: Book Five (Princes of Prophecy) Page 2
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Page 2
I take a form from the top of what she had me sign and put my email on it then hand it back. “Just send the fuckin’ bill. There isn’t a Brother in our Club that doesn’t take care of their kids or pay their bills. You need to get a clue and open your eyes. Not all bikers are bad.”
Prez takes the bag and papers and pulls me to Dakota. “Let’s get the fuck out of here.”
Dakota hands me Mucimi. I turn to the nurse. “When did he eat?”
“An hour ago.”
I don’t know whether to believe her, but nod and walk with Dakota. Prez stays behind us. “What is your boy’s name Brantley?”
“Mucimi Blackhawk.”
“Very good name, our people will be honored and your family will be proud.”
I’m so glad he’s here. Getting that takes some of my nervousness away. “Why are they so rude?” Seeing my boy for the first time should have been easier than what they made it.
He turns and hits the elevator button. “Perhaps they do not understand the ways of Brotherhood and the Princes of Prophecy. They are far from our home Brother.”
I nod kissing my little boy’s head. He’s so damn small. Prez’s boys were small when they were born. They’re both good and strong.
“They were small Brother. Both made it fine with just me muddling through the first month. You have help and he’s healthy. We got your back Brantley, in all things we’re here, just let us know what you need.”
I love the fuckin’ Brotherhood. “I will Prez. I have his crib and a few things for him. I think I was waiting in case she changed her mind.” I can’t believe she isn’t the woman I thought she was. I had hoped she’d come back. Not just for the couple of minutes to tell me she was having an abortion.
His hand is on my shoulder. “She’s exactly who you thought she was. Cover Mucimi before we walk out, it’s windy up here, keep him against your chest until the doors close.” I nod and wonder how he knows what Trina is like.
“Is there a blanket in the bag? The nurse said they have supplies in it.”
We stop at the door he looks. “No Brother.”
I turn and walk back to the nurse’s station on this floor. “Can I have a blanket?”
The nurse looks surprised but nods. She walks to a room and comes out with a white blanket. “Do you need my name or the bracelet number to bill it out?”
She shakes her head no and I walk away. Weird fuckin’ people in this hospital. I cover my boy and walk out with Dakota and Prez.
The ride home seems faster. Prez was right; I won’t let him go. He wears the felt squares Dakota uses for the kids and a smaller pair of cans. I take a picture and send it to Joey telling her I’ll explain it tomorrow. I text Taylor to come to the house after the Club no matter what time it is and send him the same picture. I’m excited for my family to meet my son, Mucimi Blackhawk.
At the hangar Prez walks with me to my truck. “I had a Prospect put in a seat for him. Lily sent someone for all the basics and more formula. You’ll be good for a couple of days. Take the time and get to know your son.”
“Thanks Prez. I will.” We get Mucimi and his bag in, I clip the belt and fix the straps so they hold him; he’s so small. I’m smiling when I close the door. I’m taking my boy home.
He pulls an envelope out of his jacket. “This is from Trina. You read it when the baby is settled and you’re alone. I’ll find you if you need me.”
Fuck. It’s not good. I nod with a lump in my throat. I put it in my jacket pocket.
“You’ve got this Brantley. You’re already a good dad.” He hugs me. “Read it when you’re alone. Call to me and I’ll find you.”
“I will Prez.” I let him go and he walks to his bike. Walking around the truck, I think again how much I love the Brotherhood. Whatever it is he’ll have my back. I pull myself in smiling at my boy in his seat. “We got this Mucimi. Me and you will get through everything together. You’re going to love it here.”
I talk to him on the ride home. Prez follows us and throws respect as I turn into the driveway.
Taylor is here and opens the door as soon as I stop. “Is he okay?”
I smile. “He’s perfect.”
“He’s early and Prez took Dakota.”
I slide out and walk to his side. “He held him and said he’s good.”
He relaxes then smiles. “Mucimi Blackhawk is finally home Brother.” He hugs me tight. “Congratulations Brant. A fuckin’ dad.” He laughs. “Mom’s going to be pissed you knocked a girl up, but she’ll be so happy with a grandbaby of her own now.”
I laugh. “She will. Trina said she was covered though Brother.”
He gets a serious look. “Did you see her?”
I struggle with the belts getting Mucimi out. “No. She didn’t want that.”
He takes the bag and walks behind me. “She wasn’t like that here. What’s up with all this not seeing you? I thought for sure she’d come back.”
I did too. I think about the letter in my pocket and push it away. Now is not the time. “I don’t know Brother, but I got my boy. I need to think about him now.” I walk through the door and feel myself relax. “Prez said Lily sent some basics. I need to change him and get his bottle ready. He’ll be hungry soon.”
Taylor laughs. “She came by and gave a list over the phone. It’s a fuck ton of shit, but her and Jess put it all away for you.”
I smile. They’re fuckin’ awesome. I walk right to his room on the side of mine. “Shit. I needed all this?” There’s a dresser that matches the crib, a playpen thing, a swing, and another seat that you carry babies in.
“The drawers are full and the bathroom stuff is in there. Kids need a lot of shit.”
I guess so. I put him in the crib and unwrap him. He must be hot in the blankets. He just watches me. “Looks like I wasn’t very good at being prepared for you. I’ll do better now that you’re here.” I get a diaper and look in the drawers for something to put on him. Thank God they got pajama things. There’s little jeans and shirts in here making me laugh. He’s going to be Badass right from the start.
When I get his little shirt off I see his belly button. It’s black sticking out. “Fuckin’ gross,” Taylor says making me smile.
I wipe it with the alcohol thing and he takes in a breath. That’s got to hurt. I keep going and get a tiny diaper on him then his pajamas. He never makes a sound.
“Is Jeremy here?”
“He went home today. He’ll be back tomorrow,” Taylor says, picking him up while I take the diaper, the wipes and shirt out of the crib. “I’m your uncle. You have a shit ton, but I’m your favorite.” I laugh following him out.
I dump the diaper and throw his shirt in the laundry room basket then wash my hands. Jeremy must have had something important to do if he isn’t here. I’m glad he’s here tomorrow. I open the cabinet I put bottles in and laugh. “Think we got enough?”
Taylor smiles at me. “I boiled and dried them.”
“Thanks Brother.” I pull one out with the bag things and a nipple that always reminds me of a woman’s. From the bag the hospital gave me, I pull everything out setting the formula aside. They didn’t send much more than diapers, powder and wipes. I put them back in the bag. I can use this until I get something else.
“Why you putting it back?”
“I need something to carry it in for now.”
He shakes his head. “You’re not carrying that pussy bag around Brother. Lily got a bag.”
I take the shit out and turn to make his bottle. It’s a plain blue bag. I don’t get why it’s a pussy bag. I turn with the bottle ready to feed Mucimi and Taylor is gone. Where the hell did he go? Walking down the hall he comes out of the room with a leather backpack. I just shake my head and take my boy. At the table I sit and feed him. My heart is beating so fast it feels like it’s going to burst out of my chest. I’m feeding my son.
“That’s a bag a Prince can be proud of. I’ll get the pussy bag to the shelters.” I look over and smile,
he’s got the diaper shit in the backpack and puts the hospital’s at the end of the counter. He pulls his phone and takes a picture. Not something he does every day, but whatever. “I’m sending it to Mom in the morning. She’s going to be pissed.” He laughs. Fuckin’ Brother.
“How bad you think it will be?”
“Your first words better be she said she was covered. Dad’s going to want to know why you weren’t.”
Fuck. “I thought she might be the one Brother.”
He puts his hands up. “I was here. They never met her and won’t know anything but you knocked the girl up and she gave you the kid.”
Fuck. I nod and think about the letter while I burp my boy. The book said four ounces. He’s got two to go. When he burps I kiss his tiny head and stick the nipple back in his mouth. Prez was shocked when I told him about Trina. I know he wasn’t happy and I felt like I let him down, but he got over it after talking to me. Maybe Mom and Dad will too. I hope so. I’m already nervous about that conversation.
“You want me to stay or go?”
I look at him. “Sorry Brother, I was thinking about the conversation with the ‘rents. I got this. I’m glad you were here for me Taylor.”
He slaps my back. “Always Brother. Call if you need me.”
“Thanks.”
I watch him walk out and Mucimi’s louder sucking noise draws my eyes to him. “That’s the end little guy.” Putting him on my shoulder I burp him again.
I look for my jacket and wonder if he should go to bed. He needs to eat again in four hours. I don’t want to let him go right now so I take a blanket, the envelope and my boy to the living room. We sit on the couch. Once the blanket is down I lay him on it. He’s sleeping and doesn’t open his eyes when I put him down. I can’t wait to hear his little voice, then smile at the thought. He’d have to be crying, it’s not like he’ll talk this young.
I watch him breathe, memorizing his little face then set the alarm on my phone for every four hours. With nothing else to do I pick up the envelope and look at it hoping it isn’t as bad as I think it will be.
The last time I saw her replays in my mind.
“I’m pregnant.”
I smile at her. I don’t know if she’s the one, but she’s worth finding out and now a baby. She may be it. Now she’ll stay. “We’re having a baby! You can move in here. It will be good. The college is twenty minutes away.”
She cries, but they aren’t happy tears. “I’m having an abortion. I can’t have a baby.”
I remember feeling my heart stop. “No!”
She looks at me. “I can’t have a baby. It’s my decision.”
“What would make you think I’d let you kill my kid. It’s my decision too!”
“This isn’t up to you Brantley.”
“Get out! Get the fuck out! You are not who I thought you were if you can do this because it would be an inconvenience! It isn’t up to me? I have no say over my kid?” She shakes her head no. “We work for good here. Making the life better. There’s nothing good about killing a baby. My baby. Just get out. I can’t look at you right now.”
She left. When I calmed down I called her, but she wouldn’t answer my calls. I decided to email after a week hoping I wasn’t too late.
I was so fuckin’ happy she wrote back that I wasn’t. I’m not sure why, but I didn’t really believe she’d give me my baby. I think I just wanted her back with our baby. Not wanting to think about what that says about me; I open the envelope.
Brantley,
So many times I wanted to call you. So many times I needed you to know what was happening, but I didn’t have the strength to deal with you and being pregnant.
Forgive me.
I spent five weeks with you that were the happiest of my life. I didn’t tell you everything that I should have. I wanted a vacation from my reality and it was the best vacation I could have had. Being with you was like a dream come true. If I could have, I would have spent all my time there. I’m sorry I didn’t.
The headaches I was getting were from a tumor. My time is limited and I knew it. I didn’t want to face that reality so I fell into yours. A dream world where everyone takes care of each other. People are so happy in your world. I wanted it for as long as I could have it. I don’t know if we would have ended up together, but you were my first love. That one is always special.
While I am pregnant I refused treatments so our boy would be healthy. I am on bed rest now and have two months to go. The doctor tells me he’s healthy. I’m so glad he is.
The tumor is growing and I was scared. I didn’t want to die. I kept thinking I am too young to die. Your email gave me strength to leave a piece of me behind. Refusing treatment didn’t change anything but the time I had here. For me, the most important thing I can do with that time is fight to give you your son.
I know if you were here you’d worry, fight with me to get the treatment and be angry at me. I deal with that from my parents now. I wouldn’t be able to see your beautiful face worried with sad eyes every day.
I’m happy with the decision I made. I get to stay with you forever through our son. That’s right where I’d choose to be if I had the choice.
Our child was born out of love Brantley. I give him to you with all the love in my heart. If I could have seen you, I would have told you in person.
Take care of our son knowing he was loved by me. So much Brantley. He’s not even born, but brings me a peace that calms me. I love him so much. I tell him every day about his dad and the fairytale life he will have with so much love surrounding him. I hope he’s as happy as you are and I hope he has your smile. I think of it often.
I love you Brantley. Be well and stay happy. Let our son know I loved him for as long as I could.
Forever yours,
Trina
PS: I told him you’d give him a cool name so don’t pick something boring like Mike.
I blink the tears away and read it again. She had a tumor? She’s gone? She gave me my boy. She loved me. What if she isn’t gone? I get the paperwork from the counter and call the hospital. They won’t tell me anything so I call the nurses station on the maternity ward. When I explain who I am and ask about Trina the nurse tells me she fought for as long as she could. I hang up falling to my knees.
Someone’s lifting me up. I look and Dakota is standing in front of me. He gets me to my feet and hugs me. “She gave me my boy.” I feel numb. I don’t know what to think. She gave me my boy and died doing it.
“She did Brantley. Women are so much stronger than men. She believed this was the way to show her love for you through him. Your son is a gift like no other Brantley. She wanted you to remember that love mucimi. Forever and always.”
My breath catches.
“Breathe Brother. You now have a son that needs you to show him the love his mother told him about. Be the man she knew you would be and celebrate your son every day for the gift that he is.”
I let him go and step back. Wiping my hand down my face I walk to my boy. He’s my gift from Trina. His eyes open and he watches me. I lift him up looking in his eyes. “Your mom loved you Mucimi.” I kiss his head. “I’m so glad she did.”
I feel Dakota’s hand on my shoulder and heat runs through me. I smile at my boy. He’ll have this too. The Brothers are always there when you fall and will always lift you up. I smile. Literally.
Dakota laughs. “Always Brother.” He squeezes my shoulder. “You will be a good father Brantley. Your boy will be a special like Mase, Jacob and Taylor, but will have the vision of Jeremy and Aubrey.”
I look at him. He’s smiling so I smile. My boy the protector. I want to ask him a million questions but I know I can’t. I can be happy with this right here.
He laughs. “I would not answer. Jeremy will be here in the morning. He needs to hold his nephew. Be prepared Brother. He does not come alone.”
“Fuck.”
I hear him laughing as he walks out the door.
I put Mucimi down a
nd look for a frame. When I find it, I put the letter in and hang it on his wall. He needs to see that his mother loved him. Feeling more settled I go back for my boy and put him on my bed. It’s one thirty. I shake my head. Dakota showed to get me through whatever I was going through. “Love the fuckin’ Brotherhood.”
I put my phone on the night stand and throw on some shorts then lay down with Mucimi on my chest. “I love you Mucimi.” I kiss his head and close my eyes.
Chapter Two
Brantley
I open my eyes and hear low voices. Shit. Mucimi is still on my chest. I fed him and went right back to sleep. My alarm goes off and he opens his eyes as I reach for the phone to shut it off. “Sorry little dude. It sounds like we have company. Let’s get you changed and we’ll go find out who and why while I feed you.” He doesn’t answer, so I get up and change him.
I smell coffee coming down the hall. At least they made coffee. I walk through the door and see Prez and Taylor. “Brothers.” Taylor takes Mucimi, so I make his bottle. While it’s warming I make me a coffee.
They aren’t talking. “What brings you here before seven?” I pull the bottle out and shake it then squish the air out and hand it to Taylor.
“The ‘rents are on their way,” he says smiling.
“You sent the picture already?” He could have waited. Some room to breathe might have been good. Mom is going to be pissed. Shit. I wipe my hands on my shorts and sit.
“Relax Brother. They won’t be pissed once they talk to you. You good?” Prez asks.
“Yeah. Dakota came by last night.” I look at him. “The woman that yelled at me, she was Trina’s mom?” He nods. Shit.
Taylor sits. “You didn’t call me. What happened?”
I look away from his eyes. “Trina sent a letter. I don’t want to talk about it right now.”
He puts his hand on my arm. “Alright Brother.”
I throw him chin. “How long do I have?”
Prez laughs. “I’d say about twenty minutes.”
“Fuck.”
“They’re all coming. I’ll stay until they calm down. My dad will ask you about a dog. Don’t take the fuckin’ dog.” I laugh. “Glad to see that.” He smiles.